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Attorneys Vic Hill and Brad MacDonald

Divorce decision should not be judged as harmful to children

Parents in Georgia who are considering divorce may in many cases be doing their children a disservice by putting off the inevitable in the hope of protecting the children from the negative effects of a marital dissolution. Communication between spouses of the consequences of divorce on the children is a healthy exercise that should be encouraged. All too often the lack of communication escalates the assumptions and misperceptions, leading to greater chasms of misunderstanding between the spouses, which negatively impacts the children.  

The symptoms of a festering marital relationship can affect the children in a variety of  emotionally unhealthy ways. Consequently, it is wrong to be judgmental about the decision of two persons to divorce. The divorce decision was at least partly made to protect the children from continuing involvement in the traumatic interchanges occurring between two unhappy and incompatible parents.

In that sense, it is also wrong for the divorced parents to feel guilty and self-critical about their decision. Indeed, recent studies indicate that children of divorce often do better because of the cessation of continual marital hostilities. Children will usually benefit from the establishment of a more secure and dependable post-divorce environment. Moreover, there is no reason why a divorced parent cannot be as good or better a role model for their children than a married parent.

Of course, this usually works much better when the parents have figured out how to communicate and cooperate in their co-parenting functions that continue after the divorce is finalized. Whether one lives in Georgia or elsewhere, an experienced family law attorney will understand these dynamics and assist the client to transition from the problematic marriage into a more self-confident post-divorce structure. In some cases, using the services of a counselor can also be helpful in the transition.

Source:, “5 Things Divorced Parents Really Want You to Know“, Serge Bielanko, May 26, 2015